When you have a baby, the world suddenly makes sense. Everything seems to fall into place. When I had my first baby I remember vividly seeing the world in a different way. The feeling came back in a stronger more dynamic way this third time round. I asked myself how can this feeling be nurtured forever. I was wearing a new pair of glasses.
The world in my new glasses;
I’ve been waiting 9months to get my new glasses
The longest most exciting wait yet
Planning and preparing, nesting. And, finding space
Where will this new person physically fit and emotionally is there capacity for one more relationship.
Because it was a third, I was more prepared but that meant in turn there was more preparing to be done. I knew what was to come and what I wouldn’t have time for anymore once he was here in my arms.
The new glasses really were a perfect fit, it was as if I was seeing the world on a new HD mega screen where everything is beautiful, vibrant and luscious.
Next there is an incredible sense of purpose which is created within, I am very much in the moment doing and being. The yogis call it finding your dharma, when you are deep in the action of doing something and living in the moment.
I feel more myself then I have before, I’m glowing as if I’ve had an expensive facial
There are moments of course. Moments of frustration that I’ve never felt before and my inner child rushes to the surface; there’s work to be done, there’s learning that keeps going.
There are moments of worry. Will I drop him, is he too cold or I check over and over again that’s he’s breathing.
A feeling of serenity and peace takes over and a force of being slow means that the world all around feels slower.
“No rush no rush” - the mantra we keep reminding ourselves. Our busy world still keeps to times and deadlines but our tiny little man has no schedule and he tells us; “no rush, no rush”. This is the hardest lesson.
I manage to leave the nest with just him wrapped up in the pushchair, me and him and he feels so light compared to my first at this newborn stage. She felt cumbersome but he is as light as a feather and I can breathe.
I see from a far as if I am watching a film the world in turmoil and the chaos unfold. But I feel calm and content and hopeful, this is the feeling I want to contain and to tell everyone about. This is the feeling that drives us and heals us. It’s my new glasses.